Sports

Penalty Shouts: NBA Playoffs

The NBA playoffs are here, and nobody should be excited. Seriously. We all know what’s going to happen. The Golden State Warriors are going to go for their third straight ring in a row, and they will get it. Maybe it’ll be more than four games, which happened last year, but in the end, no one can stop them.

The closest things that have “beaten” this boring regular season team are the Kevin Durant vs. Draymond Green drama and learning that Steph Curry was blind up until a month ago. Seriously! He has some genetic condition and was legally blind before this. Shooting threes and breaking every record. Now he’ll just be banking in full-court shots every game. What kind of defense will beat that?

And the Philadelphia Sixers? Led by someone whose conditioning level is "at 69 percent" and an Australian guy who can’t shoot who is going to get the Kardashian kurse. The Toronto Raptors? Come on. The NBA will die before it lets the one team in Canada win. Nope. The Houston Rockets? They had their chance to unseat the Warriors last year and failed.

And LeBron and the Lakers? With the coach fired and the Magic gone, who knows. Maybe LeBron will somehow get 37-45 Lakers into the playoffs after they start. I mean, LeBron can start a school, and media company, and make movies, so he can get the Lakers in the playoffs.

But no, the Warriors are still winning. If I were a betting woman, I’d bet my life savings on the Warriors winning. But since everyone thinks that, it’s probably good that I’m not a betting woman.