Horoscopes

Aries
March 21 - April 19

Maybe you're a meteor, maybe you're a flying meatball. Either way, you are a force to be reckoned with!

Taurus
Apr. 20 - May 20

Juicy.

Gemini
May 21 - June 21

What are finals?

Cancer
June 22 - July 22

When you look at your screenshots...

Leo
July 23 - Aug. 22

"Ded" inside.

Virgo
Aug. 23 - Sept. 22

8:30 lecture hitting you like:

Libra
Sept. 23 - Oct. 22

Praying for the last ABP cookie.

Scorpio
Oct. 23 - Nov. 21

Feelings after Greek Sing:

Sagittarius
Nov. 22 - Dec. 21

Multitasking like:

Capricorn
Dec. 22 - Jan. 19

Kissing winter goodbye B****!

Aquarius
Jan. 20 - Feb. 18

Seeing a wild Subra on the street.

Pisces
Feb. 19 - March 20

When life gets hard, punch it in its big dumb face!