Horoscopes

Aries
March 21 - April 19

In the words of the great and wise Ms. Frizzle, it is time for you to “take chances! Make mistakes! Get messy!”

Taurus
Apr. 20 - May 20

Though you’d love to stay curled up warm in your bed, life stills goes on. The weather will not be getting better anytime soon, so bundle up and brave the cold.

Gemini
May 21 - June 21

When discussing stupid decisions one of your friends made with another friend, try to do so where others can’t hear it. I really don’t need to know when your friend’s court date is.

Cancer
June 22 - July 22

Cast your fears aside and do something that puts you out of your comfort zone. It won’t help to make you a more well rounded person, but it will be a change of pace to your boring week.

Leo
July 23 - Aug. 22

You talk a big game, but inside you are just crying out for attention. Keep at it and you will finally annoy someone into paying attention to you. But will it make you happy?

Virgo
Aug. 23 - Sept. 22

No matter how bad you want to win $1 million or a brand new sports car, there is no excuse for beating up a little kid and taking his McDonald’s Monopoly game board.

Libra
Sept. 23 - Oct. 22

Remember, glitter makes everything better.

Scorpio
Oct. 23 - Nov. 21

The only way you will survive this week is through sheer willpower and determination. Game on.

Sagittarius
Nov. 22 - Dec. 21

Whatever you do, don’t ever insult another person’s favorite Doctor.

Capricorn
Dec. 22 - Jan. 19

As much as you don’t want to admit it, the thing you fear might actually be true. Don’t beat yourself up over this, because you’re human, and flaws are just something you have to deal with.

Aquarius
Jan. 20 - Feb. 18

It’s cold outside, so time to grab a warm blanket, lots of popcorn, a few close friends, and settle on the couch for long and enjoyable nerd TV marathons.

Pisces
Feb. 19 - March 20

Last week was a doozy to say the least, but this week will be so much better. Look for a happy, unexpected surprise on Thursday.